Tales from a Not-So-Talented Pop Star by Rachel Renée Russell

HOW ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO KNOW WHEN A GUY ACTUALLY LIKES YOU IF HE NEVER BOTHERS TO CALL?!!!ĬRUSH IQ TEST: Carefully examine the following two pictures for sixty seconds. Which, BTW, brings me to this VERY important question …. I would totally FREAK if he actually did. (WE SEE A POPULAR GIRL IN DESIGNER CLOTHING.)Īfter spending hours studying the potential global impact of the Enchanted Lip Gloss phenomenon, I was shocked and amazed by my scientific findings: Enchanted Lip Gloss does NOT look CUTE on EVERYONE! Too bad, MacKenzie !!Īnyway, I really hope Brandon calls me today. (WE MAGICALLY SEE MY INNER BEAUTY.) !! AVERAGE MEAN GIRL (LIKE MACKENZIE) How COOL would THAT be?! AVERAGE NICE GIRL (LIKE ME) My special lip gloss would make each and every girl look as beautiful on the OUTSIDE as she is on the INSIDE! Something like, I dunno, maybe… MAXWELL’S ENCHANTED LIP GLOSS !

It would have the amazing power of Cinderella’s fairy godmother, be easy to use, and be small enough to fit inside a purse or backpack. I wish I had something that could magically transform ME into my perfect self. I constantly wonder how girls like MacKenzie always manage to be so… I don’t know… PERFECT. She’s a RATTLESNAKE in pink plumping lip gloss and ankle boots.īut I’m NOT intimidated by her or anything. People being shallow, self-centered girls like… MACKENZIE HOLLISTER !!Ĭalling MacKenzie a mean girl is an understatement. It’s just that I’m NOT a tag hag (also known as a totally obsessed fashion SNOB).Īnd I’m NOT hopelessly addicted to spending twice the gross national product of a small third-world country on the latest designer clothes, shoes, jewelry, and handbags, only to REFUSE to wear the stuff one month later because it’s like, OMG! Practically more ANCIENT than YESTERDAY!! WHY? Mostly because I’m the biggest DORK in the entire school.Īnd with three zits, two left feet, one cruddy social life, and zero popularity, I’m not exactly the type of girl who’ll one day be crowned prom queen.īut thanks to my wicked case of CRUSH-ITIS, the slightly-goofy-blissfully-lovesick-shabby-chic style I’m currently rockin’ would definitely put me in the running for… I’m sure THAT would NEVER happen in a million years! Not only did I have a FABTASTIC time at the Halloween dance with my crush, Brandon, but I think he might actually like me! SQUEEEEEEEEE!!!! !!ĭefinitely NOT as a serious girlfriend or anything. I think yesterday was probably the BEST day of my entire life !!

Tales from a Not-So-Talented Pop Star by Rachel Renée Russell